


the moment i knew

by jinxfabray



Series: "things you said" meme [2]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M, nothing happens bc its a drabble, there is alcohol involved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-10
Updated: 2017-06-10
Packaged: 2018-11-12 07:52:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11157486
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jinxfabray/pseuds/jinxfabray
Summary: for the prompt, "things you said when you were drunk"





	the moment i knew

as a general rule, if it’s two am and they’re somewhere that has beer, jongdae is drunk. both him and baekhyun are lightweights, and they never ever seem to remember this until it’s too late, so usually they’re the first ones to start slurring their words. baekhyun gets clingy after his third beer, jongdae can’t stop laughing if he has more than two. after so many years of hanging out together as a group, they all know exactly how it goes when this happens, but tonight’s different. 

tonight, jongdae sobered up pretty fast. waiting in the cold can do that to you, he’s learned. getting your heart broken seems to help.

he has no idea for how long he’s been waiting, but it’s been at least an hour, and he knows by now he’s been stood up and he should probably just go back inside and drink until he forgets it. it doesn’t sound healthy, but it sounds like it might work. it sounds like everyone’s enjoying themselves at the party, and there’s a tiny piece of jongdae’s heart that feels rather bitter about this. he shouldn’t be the only one having a terrible time at his own birthday party.

he hears someone coming out of the house, but he doesn’t turn around. he doesn’t want to answer any questions about why he’s sitting here by himself or why his eyes are all red or why his stupid boyfriend hasn’t shown up. hopefully if he stays very still, whoever came out will do whatever it is they came out to do and go back inside.

another very long moment passes and he’s about to turn around and kindly request the person to leave him alone, when suddenly a coat is thrown over his shoulders.

“you idiot, it’s freezing out here,” minseok says as he sits down next to him on the porch steps. he sounds like he’s probably got enough alcohol in his blood to keep him warm for another couple of hours, and jongdae finds it kinda adorable, but he pushes that thought away from his head as fast as he can. 

“i’m fine, hyung,” jongdae sulks, but he wraps himself up in minseok’s coat nonetheless. 

they sit in silence for what feels like an eternity, at least to jongdae it does. it didn’t use to be like this, they were never awkward, and he misses how easy it was before to just be with minseok without feeling like something heavy was hanging between them. he doesn’t even know what it is, and the truth is, he’s just come to accept he probably fucked up at some point and caused minseok to pull away. it wouldn’t shock him, seeing as he clearly isn’t as good with people as he thought he was, considering his own boyfriend has decided to ditch him on his birthday.

“he’s not coming, is he,” minseok says, breaking the silence with his eyes fixed on his shoes.

“nope,” jongdae sighs, popping the p like that’s gonna make it sound less terrible. “well, i’m guessing he’s not coming, it’s not like he told me he wouldn’t make it or anything.”

“fuck, dae,” minseok groans, and it takes jongdae by surprise because he’s pretty certain he’s never heard minseok curse before - definitely not with this much feeling, at least. “you’re being stupid about this, honestly, i don’t understand it.”

he’s looking at jongdae now, and jongdae regrets having wished he’d do that because his gaze is intense and full of something he can’t quite figure out, but it doesn’t feel nice. 

“gee, thanks hyung, if something was lacking from this wonderful birthday i’m having, it was definitely having someone insult me,” jongdae rolls his eyes, trying to keep his tone even and failing miserably because god, he’s not going to tear up again but everything keeps getting worse around him tonight and it’s hard not to feel like his heart is shattering. there’ll be nothing but dust in his chest when he wakes up tomorrow at this pace.

“that’s not how i meant it,” minseok says, sounding like he’s caught between being mad and feeling sorry about it, but he can’t quite decide which of those feelings wins. “you can do so much better than some asshole who keeps ditching you, dae, you shouldn’t be letting him play with you like that.”

jongdae makes a noise that’s a mix of a hiccup and a giggle, because it sounded like minseok was saying something nice about him in a twisted way, maybe. 

“i wouldn’t be so sure about that,” he says, and he has to look away because there’s so much in minseok’s eyes and he’s not used to it, not with minseok who’s usually so guarded. “i don’t seem to be too good at getting people to stick around, maybe i should just stop trying.”

minseok frowns so hard at him jongdae fears he might get a headache. it could be funny, how dramatically his expression changes when he’s drunk, but jongdae doesn’t have it in him to be laughing at anything right now.

“see,” minseok says, “you’re being stupid again.”

jongdae whines and attempts to swat at his shoulder, but minseok grabs his hand, still frowning deeply. he scoots up closer, looking at jongdae in the eyes and holding onto his hand like he’s trying to communicate telepathically something very important.

“i wish you’d stop calling me stupid,” jongdae says weakly, attempting to remove his hand from minseok’s strong grip, but he’s too strong and jongdae doesn’t exactly hate having a little human warmth to comfort him right now, even if it’s cutting off his circulation.

“i wish you’d stop being stupid,” minseok replies in all seriousness, and at this jongdae can’t help but crack a smile. he’s definitely more drunk than jongdae had thought in the beginning. “you’re the brightest person i know, in all senses, you know? like, you’re an idiot but you’re also very smart and you’re literally bright as in, it’s hard to look at you sometimes because you’re almost blinding. i really wish you’d stop letting idiots dim you down.”

so that’s not what jongdae was expecting to hear. his heart seems to have slowed down to a ridiculous pace and he can almost hear how hard it is beating, though it feels like there’s five years between each beat.

“you’re really drunk,” he replies dumbly because it’s all he can manage to say, really. minseok’s not frowning anymore, but he looks almost desperate, like it’s very important that jongdae understands what he’s saying right now. jongdae isn’t sure what to do with it, with any of it.

“yes,” minseok nods, and jongdae laughs a little at him, but minseok doesn’t seem to notice. “but i mean it, you deserve so much better, and if you could just see that, maybe you’d - you’d find better things are closer than you think. better people. you deserve better people, dae, someone that will take care of you and pay attention to you and properly love you, someone,” minseok takes a deep breath, and for a moment jongdae’s heart goes entirely still, he’s sure it does, because it’s suddenly all starting to make sense and if minseok is about to say it, jogndae doesn’t know what he’ll do. it might not be what he always thought he’d do, because the thing is - minseok is right. jongdae isn’t sure if he /deserves/ better, but it’s starting to become apparent to him that he could do better. like, light years away from what he thought was within his league. and then minseok finishes his sentence, “someone who’s not an entire idiot.”

jongdae laughs out loud at that, and minseok finally stops frowning.

“i was being serious,” he says, sounding offended, but jongdae can’t stop laughing. “hey, i meant all of that.”

“no, no, i know that, thank you for that,” jongdae says, looking back at him with a smile. “i just thought, for a second - i didn’t expect you to finish that sentence like that.”

minseok eyes him curiously, but luckily he drops the subject easily, offering to get him a beer to warm him up if they’re gonna be staying outside for much longer. jongdae watches him go, chewing on his lower lip as he thinks. he’s got so, so much to think about, it would seem.

(minseok spends an entire ten minutes standing in the kitchen, holding onto the countertop as he takes deep breathes. he nearly said it, but it wasn’t the right time. he’s glad even through the alcohol induced blur he’s in right now, he knew better than to give himself away like that. maybe jongdae will listen to him, this time, and maybe there will be a right time soon. he can only hope.)

**Author's Note:**

> @ofstellardust on twitter hmu for more prompts i love prompts


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